Femevolution

I usually don’t do two posts in a day, but I have extra time, hanging heavily on my hands, so I’ll turn to a favorite topic: women.

They’re evolving. Fast.

Yes, yes, yes, I know my previous post was about whackos with weird-ass ideas, but before you consign me to that category, hear me out, please!

Find an old year book, maybe from your Grand-dad’s High School, or even your Dad’s.  Look hard at the pics. Ignore hairstyles, and just look at the faces and bodies.  The guys look pretty much like guys have always looked, some vaguely attractive, most plain, some utterly repulsive, even without the teen-age zit collection. The girls, on the other hand, look like … well, girls. Some are pretty to one degree or another, a few are homely, most are kinda plain, but the point is, they look like girls …

Now go to a High School, or Junior college and look at people of about the same age:  the guys haven’t changed much in the past 60 – 70 years. The girls on the other hand, even the very young ones, look like womenHot women at that. WTF???  I went to high school between  1974 and 1978, and I’m here to tell you, they freaking didn’t make them like this back then!!! Hell I went to the University of Alabama, then as now, boasting some of the hottest women in the South-East Conference, at a time when the girl to guy ratio was something like 8 to 1 (I’m pretty sure one of the Football players got my 8) and they looked like children compared to even High School Aged women today!

I currently work at the University of Mississippi, Olemiss, with every bit as high a reputation for co-ed loveliness as Alabama had in my day – and the young ladies here look nothing like girls, or even women:  they look like freaking goddesses!!!

My room-mate (yes, a co-ed, and NO, it’s not like that, get your mind out of the gutter, I’m 52, and she’s my best friend) is one such: 21 years old, five foot nothing, 120 Lbs on a bad day, red hair, creamy skin, deep blue eyes, and a body that puts Scarlett Johansson’s to shame!

WTF????

Are we feeding them special womanliness-enhancing vitamins in their double-half-caff mocha latte’s? Is there some genetically engineered Goddess-augmentation molecule being spread through the air by male-dominated Government-Military-Industrial types? (If so, seriously, guys, well-done!)

Something is going on, and I’m not the only one who thinks so! Ask any guy my age who is at all exposed to large groups of young women: teachers, counsellors, coaches, or University staff … ask them and they’ll tell you, females just keep getting better and better looking – while guys continue to look pretty much the way they did in the 1940’s, minus the bear-grease hair of the times …

There are very few possible explanations:

a) It’s my imagination playing tricks on me, possibly as payback for me failing to imagine even the relatively plain girls of my High School and college years might find me attractive (back when I actually might have been.) Sort of a sick version of “You freaking HAD your chance, ass-hole, and now you haven’t even got a shot as these Goddesses’ mothers!

b) The Chemical/Biological/Genetic intervention speculated on above. Men dominate research in these fields, and women get steadily better-looking and more unbearably sexy. Coincidence???

c) It actually is an evolutionary process:  hot babes marry hot guys, breed increasingly hotter babes … but, if so, how come the guys are just as goofy-looking as ever?

Look, I’m not complaining, ok? Seriously. Since all I can do is look, I’m deeply grateful the view is improving, even as my chances fade into obscurity. But I have to wonder … what happens when the women are so increadibly hot that they can no longer bear the sight of goofy-looking men?

We could be looking at the end of the human race, unless someone can come up with some form of parthenogenesis fast

Still, if it’s going to happen, I can’t stop it. I’m gonna get the best damned camera I can find though – if humanity is coming to an end, I plan to thoroughly enjoy it!

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~ by dourscot on October 16, 2012.

2 Responses to “Femevolution”

  1. Hahahaha. Has to be all those growth hormones in milk, I think. 😛

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